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Removing Dessert From a Pedestal

10/20/2014

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When I tell parents how I approach dessert I often get a look. I think they don’t know if I am joking or being serious. The conversation goes something like “really?” “yes, really” I answer, and then I get the skeptical “okay…”

My goal with this approach is to put dessert on a level playing field with vegetables, entrees, or any other food. By doing this, dessert isn’t a reward you get for finishing your meal. It’s not any better than any other food that is served. In other words they all hold the same value.

Yes, when a dessert is served it’s probably not more nutritious then other food served at that meal, but when you remove nutrition, food is food. It’s important to not give some food more power than others.

What I suggest doing is actually serving dessert with the main meal. Everyone gets their portion of dessert and can choose to have it whenever they want during that meal. But won’t they only eat the dessert? Maybe, but that’s okay. Most people nowadays don’t serve dessert with every dinner, let alone every meal. The other point that I’m always sure to mention is that with dessert, everyone is served one portion and that’s it. To learn more about my approach with how I feed kids see here. Dessert is not served as an endless supply as with any other food. However, of what is served as a portion of dessert, the child can choose how much they want to eat.

Taking this approach to dessert removes any pressure tactics involving dessert and stops power struggles in their tracks.

When parents start to place arbitrary rules about when the dessert can be eaten it becomes a prize; something that you have to do something to get. Something that is better than those vegetables on your plate.

I had a perfect opportunity to see this at work today. Earlier in the morning my kids and I had made a dessert. Not for any reason other than we felt the urge to make it (and had the ingredients on hand). When lunch rolled around my daughter was eating her rice, bean and vegetable dish (*see recipe here) and my son was already done and having a few bites of the dessert. I took out the dessert portion for my daughter and placed it beside the last remaining bites of her main course. I didn’t say anything other than it was for her. She choose to eat the dessert at that point in her meal. When she was done she simply went back to finishing off the rest of her lunch.

In her mind, one was not necessarily better than the other. They were both quite different and both something that she enjoyed.

Do you need help stopping meal time battles? Contact Jill, Nurture The Future’s Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com

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Avoiding a Mealtime Battle

9/11/2014

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Many people come to me with concerns around their toddlers eating. Daily life with a toddler can be very challenging. It can be a constant battle for power. I feel that picking your battles is an important skill.

What’s better than having to choose if this battle is ‘really that important?’ Removing it all together! When it comes to whether a meal is eaten at all, that’s what I recommend doing.

I find that this can start with toddlers but really can happen with many different aged children and even teens. When dinner is ready the announcement “I’m not going to eat it” happens. The answer that you respond with should always be “okay.” This stops the power struggle in its tracks. An additional benefit to this response is that it gives some power back to the child, as it allows them to rely on their ability to understand their own hunger cues. There are no forms of pressure used when the answer is simply “okay.”

The next step is to require the child to come to the dinner table, not for the food, but for the company. Eating together is another large piece of the eating puzzle. I often find that when the child comes to the table they pick away at their food, however this is never a requirement. The requirement is that they sit with the family for even a few minutes regardless if they are going to eat or not.

And that’s it. Yes, it really is that simple. The key is really, honestly being okay with whether your child eats or not. If you don’t truly mean that response, your child will know and you will not avoid a mealtime battle. However, removing their need to eat at a meal removes the struggle, period.

Looking for support with your child’s eating? Both in person and online appointments available. Contact Jill, Nurture The Future’s Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com

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Involving Your Kids Part 1: Gardening

5/27/2014

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Spring is here! Now is the time to start planting a garden. Vegetables, herbs and fruits are great choices.

Never gardened before? That’s no problem. Now is a great time to learn. Just try planting one or two things this year and see how it goes. You don’t want to choose too many and have it become overwhelming. Keep it simple and it can be a lot of fun.

Having your kids engage in gardening early on can encourage them to get involved with the food system right from the planting and growing. It can help them learn more about where their food comes from. It helps encourage them to get away from screens and from being inside, giving them a reason to get outside. Kids who are involved in the growing process of their food are much more inclined to try eating it.

Don’t have a garden? That’s ok; container gardening works well too. There are many different foods that can be grown in containers. Not only will this give you fresh food to eat or herbs to add to your meals but this is another way to involve your kids in learning about how our food gets to our table. Living the way most of us do nowadays has given us a certain amount of disconnect with our food. Eating food that comes out of a package, or vegetables and fruit that have been transformed can leave kids not knowing where food actually comes from. This is actually quite common when I do a grocery store tour for kids. Growing your own food can be an empowering way to gain some of that disconnect back.

Some people choose to get a community garden plot. This allows you more room to plant what you choose and can give you a sense of community as you meet, chat and learn from other people also using the community garden. Again, this can be a great learning experience for your kids. Encourage them to learn about the different plants that other people are growing.

Have your kids choose some vegetables that they already like to eat and then try to grow them yourselves. Or if the kids are feeling adventurous you could get them to choose a new vegetable, herb or fruit that they would like to try and plant it and watch it grow. Involve them in as much of the process as possible. Take them to the store and talk about the different types of seeds that you see. If you are looking at plants talk about how to choose the one that is right – what it needs to grow, how big it will get, what it produces, etc.

Kids love to get their hands dirty and it’s a great way to learn. What a treat getting to eat what your hard work produced.

Looking for more ways to involve your kids with their food? Contact Jill, Nurture The Future’s Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com


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Grocery Shopping with Kids

3/26/2014

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Taking kids to the grocery store with you can require some preparation so that the trip is a success for everyone. Let’s face it we have all had those trips that leave just about everyone in tears and stress levels high. When shopping in the grocery store we are either the parent with the screaming kid or we are giving that sympathetic look to the parent with the screaming child while we hold our breath, hoping we will get through this shop without anyone getting upset.

Here are some things to make your trip a success:

1.     Pack a snack- take a snack that will keep your child occupied for a portion of the shopping. This allows you to speed through the shopping while they are having their snack.

2.     Write a list- trying to remember all those items that you need to have meals for the family is too much. Writing a list is helpful to make sure that you have all of the ingredients you need for the meals you are planning on until your next shop.

3.     Write a pro list- all grocery stores are laid out basically the same. Produce, dairy, meats and bread are around the other edges of the store. If you know your store well take a minute while writing the list to think of the location of the items you need. If you list them in that order,you should be more or less able to tick them of your list as you go. This way you’re not running back and forth around the store, making your time even more efficient. If this seems like a lot right now that’s ok. We always need something to work towards right?

4.     Take the list with you- writing a list is one thing but remembering to take it with you is another thing. Just remembering to take the list with you is a success so be sure to give yourself credit.

5.     Involve your kids- get them to choose some fruit and vegetables that they want to try this week.

6.     Involve your kids at checkout- get them to lift items they are able to out of the basket, scan items, put items into bags, etc.

7.     Know if the store gives stickers, balloons, etc.- sometimes distraction never hurts

8.     Breathe!

Finally remember that even if you do everything to help the trip go more smoothly there is never a guarantee. Also remember that you are not alone in this grocery -shopping mission.  

Need help with meal planning or writing your grocery list? Contact Jill, Nurture The Future's Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com 


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Dishing Out The Control

10/30/2013

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In a feeding relationship both you and your child have roles and responsibilities. Let's take a look at  what these roles and responsibilities are. 


What

  • This is the parent and caregivers role first and then the child’s role
  • Serve the same food to all family members
  • The child then decides which foods of those offered that they will eat


Where

  • This is the parent and caregivers role
  • Enjoy a sit-down family meal with no TV, cell phones or computers


When

  • This is the parent and caregivers role
  • 3 meals at around the same time with 2-3 snacks a day


How Much

  • This is the child’s role
  • Never force a child to clean their plate. Never bribe them with food
  • Children sometimes eat lots of food and sometimes eat only very little. Let them follow their bodies cue and decide when they are full


For more information about nutrition for babies and children contact Jill, Nurture The Future's Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com


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Halloween

10/25/2013

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Not everyone celebrates Halloween, however, I am often asked about a way to make it healthier and avoid all the candy. I know it can be a very frustrating time for parents. Kids are typically given an overabundance of candy wherever they go, and for some reason the quality of most candy sold this time of year leaves much to be desired. Not that candy is ever good for you.

Here are a few different ways Halloween is handled by different families.

·      Kids get a ton of candy and are given free reign to eat it whenever 
       they want and as much as they would like. I’m sure everyone has 
       heard of kids who have made themselves sick by eating too much candy.

·      Candy is withheld and given as a treat or a reward for being "good”. Click here for a post on dishing out the            control and you might also be interested in the post different kinds of pressure that will be coming soon. 

·      Avoid Halloween and hope that if kids don’t know about it or participate then everyone can avoid the issue. This,          however, usually only lasts for so long.

·      Work with the kids to use this as a teaching opportunity about balance and moderation.

·      Parents allow the kids to go trick or treating and collect candy- when the kids get home with the loot the      
       parents cash it in for something else that the child enjoys ie/ book, toy, etc. or they cash in the candy for some            type of food that is a treat for the kids but not necessarily quite as full of empty calories as the candy would be          ie/ a special home made dessert, store bought candy made from better ingredients - for example no dyes (still    
       candy but a bit of a better option), etc. 

These are only a few methods of dealing with Halloween that I have seen and I am sure that many of you have heard of more. I often see families doing a combination of these methods as well. Whatever you choose for your family I think the most important thing to focus on is the opportunity to discuss, educate and teach kids at a time like this. During the course of a year there are many times when people typically get overindulgent with food. Talking to our kids about the best ways to handle this can be a very important skill they will carry with them into many social settings throughout their lives. If you choose to celebrate Halloween try not to make it a time that creates more stress and strain for everyone in the family. Instead, decide as a family what works best and use that method.

Wondering how to incorporate some of these ideas into your family? Contact Jill, Nurture The Future’s Registered Dietitian @nf.nutrition@gmail.com  


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5 Child Friendly Snacks

9/17/2013

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These snacks work well to pack for daycare, preschool or school. They are great when your child attends somewhere that has a ban on nuts due to allergies. You can adjust the amount depending on how much your child eats and whether you are sending this as a meal or snack.
  1. Yogurt with cut up fresh fruit or berries
  2.  Seed butter banana wrap with hemp seeds. (Use a whole wheat tortilla or pita with seed butters such as pumpkin, sunflower or hemp sprinkle with cinnamon)
  3. Hummus with raw veggies
  4. Baked Tofu Sticks and raw veggies
  5.  Mini pita pizza (whole wheat pita, cheese, meat tomato sauce, veggies)
For more information about nutrition contact Jill, Nurture The Future's Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com


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Being A Role Model

8/6/2013

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  • Eat together with your child and as a family for both meals and snacks. Make an effort to model appropriate eating behaviours and table manners.
  • Be a role model. As parents we want to encourage and promote life-long habits of healthy eating for our families.
  • Involve your children. Include your children in the shopping, planning and cooking. Give them a choice between two healthy snacks and let them choose. Even planting a garden together and watching food grow and then harvesting it can get your child involved.
  • Variety is important! Always eating different foods is an easy way to make sure the child is getting a variety of nutrients.
  • Encourage your child to eat new foods. Unfamiliar foods are often rejected the first few times. Always try a different food at least 15-20 times.
  • It is important to promote and support and nurture your child’s sense of taste, acceptance and pleasure of foods.
  • Don’t use dessert as a reward.
  • Avoid pressure of any kind (including positive pressure). Remember that pressuring can seem like you are just being a good parent.
For more information about nutrition for babies and children contact Jill, Nurture The Future's Registered Dietitian at nf.nutrition@gmail.com


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I Want A Snack

7/18/2013

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When it comes to eating, often the struggle between you and your kids is about getting your kids to eat. Sometimes though, the concern is that your child wants to eat all of the time. Does your child eat a meal and say that they are hungry right after? Do they say that they want a snack constantly throughout the day?

Children often have trouble expressing their emotions. This can be for a variety of reasons- they are not used to using words to express how they are feeling, they do not get a lot of practice expressing how they feel and what is going on in their world. They are upset and a comforting thing can be eating, especially snack foods- these are often seen as the tastier and treat type of foods. Maybe your child just needs to be comforted.

Some helpful ways to get insight into what is going on for your child is to talk to them. Ask them how they are feeling and what is going on in their world.

Another way is to listen to them when they are playing. A child’s play can tell you a lot about what is going on in their world. Playing is a way for a child to process events and happenings in their life.

Remember that food is not only about nutrition. Food impacts everyone- baby, child or adult in a variety of ways. If your child says they are always hungry or they constantly want a snack look at the why. As parents you are always the best at knowing what your child needs and what works best for your family. Scheduling meals and snacks will help you ensure that your child is getting food offered at regular intervals and therefore empowers them to listen to their bodies as to whether they are hungry or not. If you are still hearing that they are hungry right after meals and that they constantly want a snack you can consider other reasons that this may be coming up for your child.

Have questions about your child’s eating? Contact Jill, Nurture The Future’s Registered Dietitian.

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    Jill Wallace, RD, CH

    Mom, Registered Dietitian and Chartered Herbalist writing about nutrition. Have a topic you want to read about? I would love to hear your idea. Email nf.nutrition@gmail.com 

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